/gen/ - General

Guess I'll start posting daily diaries too.

I originally started the MUST MOOTIVATE persona back in January 2024. Around the end of the year 2023, I realised that it felt like most of it had passed without any major events or developments.

Yes, I managed to get a job, but then it felt dull on comparison to the past few years that had been very eventful and felt like I was making progress.

I realised that at the age of 27, I was in a ditch. Had a great fall and barely managed to climb up. I spent a whole week trying to write my entire life story, major events since around high school and summarising how I got there and what did I do write and wrong.

Once I had an idea about the past, I realised that I had some habits that need to be changed drastically. I also wanted to achieve some goals, vaguely listing them, they were...

1. Get JLPT N1 this year no matter what

2. Make some progress to advance my career

3. Get better at art

4. Make a Pokemon clone

5. Rekindle some social life with actual, meaningful connections.

I think I have achieved them all except for 4.

I am not too sure if somebody is getting motivated or not, but I want to post some of the things I am working on, to get some attention, feedback or even noticing by anons who find it interesting.

My art Instagram account is dead because I was not making reels. Too much effort to do blogging and website again from zero. My friends seem to care less and less or don't understand my projects. So I think this is a nice safe place to dump my thoughts, ideas, and experiments.

Let's see ...

>>165559(OP)

plij keep posting your art in the artthread too

>>165655

Yessir, I will

>>165559(OP)

Color theory, hex codes, combinations and basic maths

20241104

I recently realised that I know very little about colours and how they combine, and so on. It pains me to see that I have less knowledge about it than the average girl. So, I decided that I want to develop a sense for colours.

Naturally, first thing I came across was colour theory. But then, it felt too hard since I had to pick a colour and try to balance it on the colour wheel and so on, besides, what hurts even more is that when I use photoshop, the interface is not exactly a color wheel/circle and I will probably make mistakes picking colours there.

Well, I thought about a place to start, when I was younger, I had learnt how hex color codes work and I could approximate colours pretty easily with some error. I decided to pick up there again. But I like to torture myself, so I will instead learn to convert hex colors to decimal RGB values.

The first problem I ran into was...

I am very slow at mentally adding numbers, and I don't know the times table of 16.

Naturally, I make a quick Javascript program in ChatGPT to practice it.

Oh wait, even before that, even basic maths with carry over is difficult to me to do fast. 5+7 takes me a few seconds to process. The absolute condition. No problem though, I made another program to practice that.

Then maybe while I am at it, I can also practice adding/subtracting from the nearest 5 and the nearest 10 for soroban practice.

Once I can add basic single digit numbers quickly, practice adding them to 16. Then practice the times table of 16 to memorise 10 to F0.

Now I made another program to practice conversion from hex to decimal and vice versa.

>>166172

Next....

After this, I can maybe memorise multiplication of 1 to F with 1 to F as a matrix, whilst converting numbers in my head.

Finally, practice adding 1 to 15 to these numbers. Phewww

Then I guess next step would be accurately sensing and selecting a specific number between 0 to 255/xFF on a slider and test how accurate I am.

Once I can do this, maybe I can practice colours #ff0000 (r), #00ff00 (g), #0000ff(b), each from #000000, and from #ffffff respectively.

Once that's down, I guess I will memorise names and hex codes of some common colours, and then finally learn colour combinations.

The end result should be that I can finally analyse and select colours down to hex codes/ RGB values without much significant effort.

Copying from Disney, practicing hex conversion, and job stuff

20241105

I forgot to write this yesterday, but last morning, I had decided that I want to draw 100 of a character each week to upgrade my drawing. This week, I'll be drawing Pocahontas from here: https://characterdesignreferences.com/art-of-animation-5/art-of-pocahontas .

I am already back on a day and I planned to draw 20 a day, guess I will draw/copy 40 of her now. Well... Let's do 20 and then get to practicing maths again.

I also have some work related to my job to finish today. It's currently 10:30 AM, let's see how I fare.

>>165559(OP)

sirs do you work in the camputar field too?

>>166257

You can say that

>>166172

20241105

I can now comfortably convert codes back and forth with some practice. I will keep practicing it every day.

I gave up on the slider estimation idea as that feels a bit overkill because I can always type and select numbers. No need to be too autistic abou tit.

>>166173

Also put the color sensing idea for now.

Instead I made a Person-Action-Object peg list/table for colors #000000 to #ffffff.

I will just memorise this mnemonic table, and then use it to make mnemonics for common colours. I will start first with the standard 140 CSS colors, followed by popular brand colors, pantone color of the year of the past two decades, and then some good pallettes for art, and then some Japanese colors.

I wasted some time today playing some clickbait phone games for some reason. I liked the character designs. An hour in, I took screenshots of the characters and then uninstalled the game because although boring, it could be addictive.

One of my pigeons lost a finger. Sad.

After starting to draw Pocahontas just 4 times, I realised that I have taken a massive task and I can probably not do it 100 times in a week with my current schedule. I can try to fit it in and replace some useless time wasting activities like coming here or playing with the phone.

Drew some animals from A to Z and picked 3 to draw randomly, will draw more tomorrow.

I wasn't able to make much progress with job-related work.

>>166644

>Also put the color sensing idea for now

meant to say "on hold"

20241106

I slept for 10+ hours and woke up late. I had a dream about somehow being back in school with all my old school friends. There were several snakes in glass on top of the classroom, followed by more snakes in a little greenhouse. Turned out that the snakes were not venomous. Also had some conflict with a 4'11" goblin Baniya, who, back in the day, tried to scam me into paying for his torn blazer.

In the dream he had some cyborg suit system inside of him which could transform him. He used the cyborg transformation to threaten me and then tried to kill me. I found his control panel, and broke it, and tricked him into plugging into a high power live socket which fried his brain and killed him. I woke up when I was under investigation for the death as I awaited post mortem results.

Had lunch.

Now I will get to the work and try to finish it all today before continuing with anything else.

20241106

I wasn't able to finish it all, in fact, I discarded most of the previous work and restarted with a simpler system that ChatGPT could help me with to finish it faster. I also got an email about some annoying changes to do. I am sure I can finish it tomorrow.

GF randomly brought up how we could have been married back then and then remarks that she likes her isolated job that lets her be like this. Kind of hurts.

I was reminded of this thot who sent her nudes to me, how I had to shoo her off when she was drunk and vulnerable. She has stopped talking with me altogether. Probably thinking that I am some kind of playboy asshole using her for benefits without commitment. I mean, I was, lmao. But still.

I am so grateful that I can poop easily and without problems. Neighborhood aunty had an accident, got admitted to hospital, and was constipated for 11 days, didn't have a single shit.

Then now she cannot stop shitting.

The worst part is that my mom has been helping her and her 37 yo divorcee whore daughter with medicines and dogsitting. I only feel sorry for my mom and the poor dog.

20241107

Had another dream where I murdered somebody and then buried the body. A fresh start to the morning.

Mom looks like she wasn't able to sleep. The dog didn't bother her, nor did she cause any drama. But apparently their house is very dirty and messy and cold. Oh well, I wish mom stopped trying to save everybody. I guess that's where I got it from. No wait, even my GF is like this, goes out of her way to help her stupid friends with their babies, dogs, plants and whatnot.

Binged on youtube a bit. I will start with my work now and make progress. No drawing since yesterday until I finish my current task. My Ohio boss must be happy that Trump won.

>>166645

>Baniya tried to scam me

Kek. Tell moar of your baniya encounters some day

>>167195

There are way too many. I would rather have the entire Jain/Baniya race genocided even if it means tolerating stupid Muslim shit. kek

In my apartment society

>Baniyas in apartment society try to poison/kill street dogs

>They actually poison them

>Try to kill puppies by making the Bhangi take them

>Drive over a puppy just because he was nice to me

>Try to claim extra space outside their apartment block illegally

>Illegally occupy shops inside the apartment premises

>One of them even trades randis

>Try to bully us into breaking a wall or restoring balcony for stupid reasons

>Place some planted pot for cats to shit in, get mad when cats shit and we ask them to clean it up

>Place Gujju trash outside home and get mad when we ask them to clean it up after the cat has fucked it up

>They steal the belt off street dogs. Probably to make their wives wear it

>They steal food bowls (old katori) from street dogs. Probably to eat from it.

>They get mad at me for feeing pigeons, because some Jain guru told them it ruins their vaastu

>They steal a 50 rupees plastic water bowl I kept for pigeons. Yeah. Probably to eat from.

>They steal my potted plants I kept on the roof. Probably to shove up their ass.

>They even steal a peepal plant with some weeds I planted. To worship a stolen god.

>Get crazy like fanboys when they see a nanga punga Jain baba walk around

>Get scared like bitches when I come out with a stick or give mom a stick when she's arguing to hit them in the head.

>>167195

>>167199

School senior

>a Baniya madarchod senior is assigned to "monitor" the class

>He decides to bully me by punishing me, plays psychologically, asks me to kneel on the stone floor, and tells me "agar tu yahan se utha, to tu aurat"

>probably because he looked like an ugly subhuman

>Later, kick that cunt in the balls

>take it a step further

>Tell him, "agar tu iss se roya to meri maa mar jayegi"

>He and his other Baniya minion start crying and complain to teacher

smh

Classmate in 11th and 12th

>Chants stupid shit like "E lund e lund e lund"

>Is dark and ugly as fuck

>For some reason wants to bully me

>I beat the shit out of him and get my hands dirty

>His blazer tears apart

>He and midget baniya grab my school diary, get my home address and rush there to complain to my mom

>try to scam me and mom into paying for a new blazer

>My mother was stupid so believed them instead of me because I kept getting into trouble

>Had the coat repaired

>Madarchod Baniya went to new lengths to bitch about it

Total Baniya death, I punched him in face and he shut up.

More classmates at school

>Rich Baniya kid who brags about his dad owning a Mahindra showroom, is tall but ugly

>Fat baniya woman who gets mad at me and drops her phone while trying to hit me

>Ugly Baniya girl who stinks

At work

>Baniya coworkers acting like snakes

>>167199

>>167200

Freelancing

>Baniyas try to scam me with freelancing

>Try to underpay me

>Try to get more work done for less pay by trying to be randis

>Try to boss me for no reason, and cry when I tell them to fuck off

>Baniya woman gets angry and mad when I refuse something

>Starts pleading and acting sweer when I don't budge.

>Gets to borderline randipana when I still don't budge.

>Usually stupid as fuck and dumb

At shops

>Baniya shopkeepers trying to scam even for minor things

>Not returning change of customers hoping they forget

>General Baniya Jewery

This nation

>Ambani robbing this cunt

>Adani fucking up mother earth

>Amit Shah looting this cunt for his ugly son

I believe that deleting Baniyas will make the world a better place in general. But that's just my bias.

Dyaush is an exception until he starts doing above activities too, of course.

If I have children and they decide to date or marry a Baniya, I will disown them and cut ties with them.

>>167200

Wait sirs, I thought all baniyas have it figured out a path for their children ue to become top jew in bujinej. But adding my observations of them along with some other pepo and yours it seems like they too are confused and don't kno what to do.

They are like the meanest jeet who actually doesn't understand thangs and does jewery because it's in their instincts. Atleast that's what I got when I found that baniya kids too go for jabs.

Atleast for middle and lower class baniyas.

>Dayush is a jew

Kek

Yaar that's somethang I made up and kept repeating till it became the truth.

One of my dreams is to eat a qti pi veg dish of a baniya granny.

>>167200

>constantly talks about their looks and height

imagine what this fag actually thinks about us incels. why do redditors like this guy act like some sort of मसीहा when they are filled with arrogance and hate inside?

>>167658

chad saviour complex

>>167184

20241107

Worked. More work to do tomorrow.

Didn't draw anything. But I compiled Aseprite from scratch. And when I was done, I discovered libsprite. lol

The day was mostly uneventful. GF was normal but then she started talking about farts. Weirdo.

But then, even other pretty girls I know occassionally do shit like that.

Found a pigeon with partial white marks. Maybe a child of one of the two white pigeons. Might be female because I rarely see her around.

Compiling Aseprite felt nostalgic. I uninstalled VS 2017. Remembering how I had such big dreams when I installed it. I used to use it for Unity games back in the day. Oh well, still time to execute on them. I have no pressure to live a pajeet life. Grateful for so many things.

More work to do tomorrow.

20241108

Woke up to a weird dream where I met somebody from bhch and punched them in the face. I have been denied for something important that I applied for. Not feeling too bad about it. There will be more opportunities.

Lots of work to do today. Hopefully I will be done soon and then I can have some time for art.

>>167658

I am 5'7". I only mention looks either because they are exceptionally ugly or short or tall, or because they somehow made me remember their appearance by constantly talking about mine.

I don't think much about most of you who are hateful and mean. But I hope at least some of you ascend and can live closer to your true potential.

>>167740

I guess that's what it is. But then, there are no saviours or heroes from the lowly downtrodden masses. Even their heroes are somebody exceptional who stand out from them.

>>167740

Laude ka chad hai ye 5'7 midget (probably exaggerated) kek. mera lund isse bada hoga, you guys always hype up some nobody

>>166172

>can't basic arithmetic

Glad I haven't been using this shithole. It was just matter of time when thangs unfold. I had gotten a hint with whom I was sharing this board with so here I leave forevaaa....phyoooooo

>>168525

>i will leave this site forevaa

this niqqa is saying this for the gorillionth time kek

>>167959

he is chad coz of face, he described his face is similar to the rajasthani chad anon

>>168793

sabka face vo rapeistani 'chad' jaisa dikhega if they squint their eyes, suck their cheeks in, jut their jaw forward and use the masculine face filter from faceapp like that 'chad' did. again stop hyping up some nobody who can just mog the average incel.

>>167747

20241108

Worked, had some time to practice drawing.

Tried to study color values on skin.

Also drew some rats.

I guess I spent a lot of time on /b/ today. Will lessen it tomorrow.

20241109

Slept late. Ooft.

Had some miscommunication with a friend. Stupid pajeeta shit about how I am not talking with her. Maybe time will solve it. Who cares.

Had some miscommunication with gf. Some weird stuff about how I don't ask her to buy me gifts or something. Time will solve it.

I was thinking about old 90s cartoons today. Mainly Dexter's Lab and Courage the cowardly dog.

Some ugly things from the sewers came to my thread to leave mean comments. Cannot be arsed to reply.

I needed to make a contact form from scratch and the existing sloppy implementation was harassing me. Learnt about Intersection Observers and Mutation observers. Damn.

I still have so much more to learn.

https://developer.mozilla.org/en-US/docs/Web/API/Intersection_Observer_API

https://developer.mozilla.org/en-US/docs/Web/API/MutationObserver

No time to practice maths or colours today. Although I think I am relatively better than a few days ago.

Thankfully didn't spend much time on /b/ today. But I have to reply to Muteanon. Let's see if I remember it tomorrow. kek.

20241110

Watched some videos on indie horror games made recently. The lowpoly art style feels inspiring and achievable. I should relearn 3D modelling once I am done with the current tasks.

I will get some rest before that.

>>169087

20241110

Slept late. I dreamt of making a script to filter posts on bhch. Decided to make it later in the day.

Woke up.

Neighbor baniya was fighting and crying about how he successfully paid for family trips and his wife wasn't able to do shit. They really live the stereotypes huh.

Went to roof. My fat pigeon was late today. Reminds me of when I was late for online meetings because I was sleeping and got into trouble because of it.

Had curry with makki ki roti. It was tasty. Watched video essays on horror movies as I ate.

Practiced drawing and rendering again. I was trying to understand the cooler tones of dark skin casting shadows. Why is color so complex.

The issue with women is resolved, somehow on its own.

Gods are kind and generous. I am grateful for abundance of everything good in my life.

Spent more time than I would like browsing random news articles and reading about APIs.

Made the filter script.

Didn't practice math or guessing colour codes today. I will do that tomorrow.

Studied and worked a bit. Time for sleep. Zzzz

20241111

Today marks 13 years since Skyrim was released. I was a teen whose parents were worried about my career and me not studying enough. Meanwhile I was pirating the Skidrow release of Skyrim on the same day. I loved that game and spent so many hours and days in Nirn. Damn.

I also attempted many times unsuccessfully to make RPGs just like that. I have learnt a lot but I regret not having enough complete projects to show. If I could go back in time to advise myself, it would be to make more complete projects no matter how small. Well, at least I am doing that now.

There's a lot of job related work to finish before Wednesday. Maybe I should keep minor personal projects on hold.

Downloaded some programming books in Japanese, hehe.

>>169931

Motivanon sir, what job do you do exactly ? I remember once you said your job is very niche, and it would be very easy to doxx you if you told us exactly what you do, because the number of people that do it in India can be counted on one hand.

Is all that true ? If it is, can you atleast tell what your job is about without revealing any details ?

>>170451

His job is trying to o grab as much attention as possible from anons

By making up fake stories about himself and pretending to be a chad

He has never shown any proof of whatever he claims to be true.

>>169931

>20241111

Signed up for leetcode just to grind and see if I can still do basic problems or not. I had work to do but couldn't focus well.

Worked on my memory palace to memorise the chess board.

Gf had some online training to do for which she couldn't find the time. Asked me to fill in some hours for her. So I spent some hours sitting through boring government courses, until I found something actually usefull, spent 2 hours revising statistics.

Well, win-win. I realised I need to revise a lot of basics here too. Ooft.

Watched videos about implementing chess engines, thinking of doing that in Javascript.

>20241112

Had a long and crazy dream about going somewhere with my family and somehow discovering on my way back that I have been doxxed and somebody posted my real name with address and social media on bhch. It felt so real and stressful, I ended up oversleeping.

Going to limit shit I post here and avoiding photos or anything too specific from now on.

>>170451

>can you atleast tell what your job is about without revealing any details

Let's just say it's some kind of project coordination/management job.

Cannot mention any details beyond that.

>>170469

I have posted proofs of the chats with women, posted some of my certificates, and even once made the mistake of posting part of my face once.

Not going to prove anything. Don't believe me if that's what gives you comfort. Good luck anon.

>>170696

>I have posted proofs of the chats with women, posted some of my certificates,

repost them again with timestamp

and end this discussion

if you didn't do it then I will consider you are larping

>>170705

Consider it a larp. Whatever makes you happy.

>>170732

thanks for proving my point

>>170696

>Taking haxxornon seriously

Yaar

>>170696

>20241112

Started Google Analytics course with a friend as a study buddy. A bit behind on progress.

Also started Chess programming tutorial in ancient Javscript from 11 years ago. (Skyrim came out 13years ago, maybe not that ancient considering that at times I am mentally still there)

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLZ1QII7yudbe4gz2gh9BCI6VDA-xafLog

The way he uses bitwise operators check random moves or record castling is kind of funny and roundabout. I would have definitely not thought of these ideas if I were to do it from scratch on my own. I guess there's a lot to learn studying something you already know from a different perspective.

Played a cute phone game about bees. No intrusive advertisements. Nice.

Did some work. Need to finish some shit on Wednesday before Thursday's meeting.

Gf (almost typed her name out loud) had rapidly changing moods today. Called me to not fight with her.

Father came back from his langda-beating trip. Visited some Ashrams on the way. Brought back sweets. I miss the time when eating sweets felt fun. Is it dopamine receptors or just taste buds hmm.. Okay, just googled. It's probably just the allergy. kek. I will be alright.

Didn't draw today. Learnt about Jules Cyril Cave, immediately knew his paintings had heavy influence from the one true god - Bouguereau. Bouguereau is a Bodhisattva and

Saint, if not a divine being in his own right.

>>171144

20241113

Woke up late due to weird dreams. Forgot what it was about. But I dreamt of seeing some violent accident on bhch and well, I saw that Dehradun thread whem I woke up.

Weird shit.

I spent way too much time eating grapes and oranges today than I would like. I almost concluded the day by just binging on YouTube, doing mundane work, and not learning anything new.

But well, no.

I revised the JS chess engine tutorial. He uses really bad programming practices for odd reasons but I will endure.

To top off the day, I reverse engineered 3D models from a game I used to play in childhood. Although I followed old forum posts of people attempting the same, and using some ChatGPT help to analyse it, I feel really fucking smart because I made a converter to translate it back and forth.

Ah fuck, I cannot even mention what game it is without getting doxxed. Are my interests that niche or am I just too vocally present in so many places?

Anyways, feels smart to finally put my base 16 and maths practice to use. As a child I always dreamt of being able to reverse engineer file formats and today I was finally able to do it.

I guess next would be figuring out how animations work and reverse engineering them?

>>172000

20241114

Got engrossed in reverse engineering the 3d model format and making a tool.

Then decided to move onto another game to reverse engineer a tool to open and pack archives of a game I used to play as a child.

I got so engrossed that I forgot that this palce even existed.

Oh yeah, happy children's day

20241115

Continued with efforts to reverse engineer the archive. Put in a total of 12 hours total since yesterday only to find out that somebody had casually done it, made the exact kind of tool I was trying to make and dropped it without any advertising or even sharing back in 2015. What the fuck.

I feel like a fraud. That I should put in more efforts into learning everything from scratch. Maybe I should take learning C seriously for reverse engineering. Anyways, putting reverse engineering to a hold. Felt like I had a big crisis.

20241116

Today I was busy filling some forms and paperwork. Dropped to check bhach. No interesting threads. Meh.

Played a brainrot game. Realised I can make it. Well, putting the idea somewhere.

My father was yelling like a madman outside for some small issue. I need to get my shit together and move out before he goes fully senile.

Used ChatGPT to make a business card for a friend. Hehe. I would have used powerpoint or something earlier. But why bother. Seems like you can do everything with python huh. Maybe I should look into using ChatGPT to reverse engineer games. hmm...

20241117

Spent all day working on filling the form. This year has been very transformative for me. I have basically been questioning my entire identity and existence for most of the year.

A friend asked me for a favour to write scripts for his videos. Guess we will be doing that from now on.

20241126

After some consideration and reflection

I have decided to leave bhch. At least for a few weeks, if not months, or forever.

It's a low energy place full of evil people, not too different from the ones they hate, perhaps even more vile.

I will post my art elsewhere and keep my thoughts and musings private.

Dyaush, if you're reading this, please delete this thread. Thanks.

>>180862

hey man pls dont leave. i like your posts. no need to entertain zoomers if they cuss you out. you can still post gen yaar

>>182684

I was just checking this place to see if it was deleted and to post my art

Idk man

I'm basically the villain here if I post about my personal life from now on.

Enjoy my rats

>>183246

i love to read your interesting experiences, keep posting them

>>180862

>Dyaush, if you're reading this, please delete this thread. Thanks.

Nvm then I guess

I'll post once a week

>>180862

Gorilla post dayo. Gorilla posto

>Instead of one single gen where you might dox yourself, you make several separate threads with a writing style that's generic

>Don't namefag

Otherwise there are vile pepo like haxxornon that was bullying you, everywhere.

>>183257

bhag ja madarchod wapis kyu aya

tera baap ka ghar hai kya?

randi ke bacche jahil namefag

>>183290

You need to go back to discord.

>>183266

Good strategy

But then, there's limited value here except as an outlet of my goblin thoughts

>>183307

Abe madarchod

Yui troon pedo tu apne blogpost thread me wapis ja

Yaha par apni ma mat chuda

>>180862

I do not disagree with ur assessment sirs.

>Dyaush, if you're reading this, please delete this thread. Thanks.

Sad to see u go, please confirm for deletion.

>>180862

Even if you are leaving, please let your thread remain here. Nhi toh mere jaise weak hearted anons ke liye koi source of motivation nhi bachega.

>>183337

>>183352

Decided against deletion

I'm just not going to check /b/ for a few months and come here to vomit intrusive thoughts here I guess.

I have said a lot that can get me in trouble already. That's my only concern. kek

>>183353

/b/ is cancer. stay away from these fags. sadly theyre spreading to gen now. case in point ->

>>183335

>>183290

>>183355

Mooooooooommmmmmmmmm.....

My general is being invaded......

Ma chuda and cry more madarchod

>>183388

>>182684

>>183251

>>183266

>>183307

>>183337

>>183352

>>183355

>>183468

Get off his dick blud 😭🙏

>>183473

>>183473

Lmao this

Redditors dickriding a namefag

Lol